Writing Thank You Notes after a Funeral

March 14, 2024

While it may be difficult to find the energy to write a thank you note after a funeral, doing so is an important way of acknowledging the love and kindness that friends and family members have shown you during this challenging period in your life.

The etiquette of acknowledgement is truly a very personal and individual matter.

While it may be difficult to find the energy to write a thank you note after a funeral, doing so is an important way of acknowledging the love and kindness that friends and family members have shown you during this challenging period in your life. There is no set deadline when it comes to sending out thank you cards, though getting them out within two to three weeks after the funeral is ideal.


Types of written acknowledgements commonly used.

For simplicity, there are many sympathy acknowledgement cards that are printed with verses appropriate for the given situation. Others may find that a blank note card is a great way to express thoughts, as the individuals can write special messages for each recipient. Individuals may also order formal, customized cards to make distribution easier, without taking away from sentiment. The funeral home can assist with these options.


Who should receive a thank you card?

Sending thank you notes to every attendant is not necessary, but it is important to formally acknowledge those who provided extra assistance or services throughout this period. For instance, those who have:

  • Sent or brought flowers
  • Made a donation to a charity in honor of your loved one
  • Sent personal letters of condolence
  • Provided assistance with food, children or running errands
  • Acted as Pallbearers
  • Musicians who performed at the funeral
  • Read at the service
  • Presided as clergy over the service


To make sure that you do not forget anyone during this chaotic time, you should keep a notepad and pen handy at all times. Do not rely on your memory to keep track of what people have done for you. If need be, you can assign a friend or family member to keep a record for you, to make the task more manageable.


By identifying floral tributes with information cards, the funeral home can be especially helpful when keeping track of who contributed. Digital photos of these arrangements can make for an easier reference at a later date as well.


When writing thank you notes, length is not important. Individuals will find that sending out short messages, rather than long letters, can be just as appropriate when acknowledging one for their kindness and respect.

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